Rain rain go away.. Not really raining. lol

Today is one of them days where I really don’t feel like doing anything!
Here at Greenway, as well as Apollo High School, we have a thing called late start. It gives us a chance to get all caught up with our work from 7:30- 9:00 am. We go in and make up or bring up in my case any work we need. Well this week I’ve been slacken’ a little, but I’ll be back to normal. So I did exactly this, woke up, took a body shower, hair up, backpack on and left! I got here right at 8:50 am and now I’m just here. So spring break was uberly fun. I figured 2 things out; my brother Daniel and his beautiful girlfriend Ana are the coolest persons to walk the planet. I spent the whole week with them, watched movies, ate and even drank a tad bit! Lol. But any who, Ana invited me to a baby shower which was great! But what the best part was 1 movie. So the hype about Twilight was not really my scene. I’ve never been into the science fiction stuff. Like Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings and Pirates of the Caribbean. So when the hype was up, I kind of ignored it. Well at the baby shower which happened to be the day after the movie Twilight came out, Ana suggests that we watch it. So with nothing else to do I comply. We start and you have no idea how much I got into it. I was about 3 centimeters away from the television! Ha. Throughout the movie I screamed “GO TEAM EDWARD!” typical me. Any who I am anticipating reading the book. I’ve put it on hold at the library and it’s ready to be picked up! Very exciting! And uhm what else has been happening? Hmm. Well I’ve been spending some time with my beau, aka BF. We went to go see 2 movies already. And get this everyone, I didn’t have to pay! He covered the whole thing! Great right. What a change. He’s listening more, understanding me more and even smiling more. I’m on the search of a new job, one where I can actually see myself working at for more than 2 weeks. Exciting. Other than that I’ve been staying close to my paternal family! Although I do miss Lily! Lol since im spending time with my fam, I really haven’t been over. But I have NOT FORGOT her. Lol.

So the time is 11:15 am and im in class taking my time, reading a new book I got called the Little Bee... I will let you all know how it is. And right now that’s about it. Im learning to accept the fact that I will always be imperfect, and im so fine with that. =)


Chow,

Messa
Xoxo

For daddy to read.

I love you dad.. keep reading Life Lessons

You may have thought I didn't see,
Or that I hadn't heard,
Life lessons that you taught to me,
But I got every word.
Perhaps you thought I missed it all,
And that we'd grow apart,
But Dad, I picked up everything,
It's written on my heart.
Without you, Dad, I wouldn't be
The (woman)(man) I am today;
You built a strong foundation
No one can take away.
I've grown up with your values,
And I'm very glad I did;
So here's to you, dear father,
From your forever grateful kid.
By Joanna Fuchs

and theres another one about you.

Possessed..

Today is a cold cold day. I’m currently in school, but have no motivation to do anything other than write what I’m feeling. I don’t know what I feel actually. Lately, I’ve been thinking, what the heck am I going to do with my life? Am I going to grow up and get a career? I mean graduation is right around the corner, what next? I’m very nervous about the future. I honestly am. Will I make it? Will I succeed? I have a lot of flaws I need to work out by the time I enter the real world. The “working for everything I have” world. The “I don’t care if your late your fired” world. The “wondering, will this be all I’ll amount to?” world. The “how can I make things better” world. And last but not least, “the will I survive on my own” world. I’m going to name my flaws; 1. I DO NOT know how to save money. Honestly, the only reason I have money saved right now, is because someone else has it holding it, otherwise, it would have been spent. 2. Sometimes (most) I cannot motivate myself into doing something I know is good for me. Really, school is so hard, not the lessons or classes the getting up early to go. 3. I look for the easy way out. I try and find out how I can maneuver through the difficult part. 4. I’m afraid to do the “big” things alone. What if I mess it all up? What if I cannot learn to fix the mistakes?
I know it’s not good to point out flaws and your thinking “look at the bright side” but honestly, is there a “bright side?” Are you as a person reading this thinking, “Dang, that’s true?” Because honestly, the government has us trained so well to live in these apartments or homes that are basically little boxes. They train us so well to discriminate, be envious, and go around life thinking “I wish I had this or that.” Not to be preaching, but, come on, I think I would have been perfect if I were living the way Adam and Eve were; Naked with the whole land to eat. Damn snake. I have 10 weeks to go to become an official adult. It’s like everyone is out for themselves. For instance, banks, when you don’t have any more money in your card (debit or credit), they let you spend it anyways, and then when you check a bank statement, it says, “you are insufficient $68.30 from a purchase at Frys Food and Drug store, and now owe $98.30, thanks if you have any questions or concerns, call. Have a nice day, Bank of America.” I would have been fine with the “were friends, take this fruit.” Or how about your cell phone bill, when you have no more minutes, they let you talk anyways, and in the little fine print of the contract It says, “.50 per minute after the first 5 minutes of miss-minute-use.” I would have been fine with just going and getting a can, putting a string to it and attaching the other can to the other side. At least that was fun. Gay. I know I may be rambling, but oh emm gee, we are so accustom to the life the government has made for us, were too blind to see that were possessed. Jesus, I hate this. My mind wanders from one thing to the other. It leads off into its own world. Then that world leads to the next. Life doesn’t make sense. Well this is my thoughts, tell me yours.
But nevertheless, I love my 4 bloggers. Thanks for the ear.

Oh yeah lets do a funny video:
Since I’m at school, I cant post one, but go to Youtube, then type in Huevos Bongos Trilogy, and look at that. Very funny. If you get easily offended, then please don’t.

Change.

Okay so change in plans, instead of Rosarito, were doing it up in Puerto Viarta! Exciting right? I know, I believe we leave on the 12th of March, so yes, very exiting! There have actually been changes happening in my life this whole week! I’ve decided to go out and get another job, but part-time. I want more money ha-ha. So the hunt is defiantly on for that. Hmm, I just want to say, that God is so good to me. I’m truly grateful to him for bringing so many wonderful people to my life. With Lily helping me so much and by her helping me walk through life, advice, laughs, frowns, and even cries, not bad though we laugh so hard we have to pull off the road to cry hahaha! “SLUG BUG, TURN AROUND!!” I believe you are put here on this earth to do at least 2 things, change a persons life which leads to changing a fraction of the world (i.e. you make a murderer change his/her ways and that leads to a little less violence, roll model, lend a helping hand), and to raise beautiful children to do the same. Well Lily has most defiantly done both! Next in line is my Beautiful Grandmother, who deserves nothing short than the best. I wish I had all the money in the world to give her, and honestly, that’s not even enough to show my gratitude. And lastly, is the parents who brought me here! Daddy-yo A.K.A. Poppa Dukes, has taught me so much. Before I was bitter and hated anything and everything about him. But now, it’s my realization that all he did was a method of his to show me a life lesson. Okay so sometimes maybe he did things not seeing it that way, but I learned from it. My daddy is a piece of me. His experiences are what show me how to go on in this cruel life. I know that he had nothing but the best intentions for his little princess. And although he has a new family and lives who knows where, I know he still thinks the world of me and wonders where I’m at. And then my Mother, I can say one thing about her; she’s a strong hard working woman. From here on out, its only getting better.

So on another note; I can’t wait till Kevin comes! Yay! My little compadre! Ha-ha. I think this time were going to finger paint, although, he doesn’t like to get his hands dirty. We once made pizza homemade, and he kept washing his hands ha-ha. But yeah.

So Music for the day?

Back in the day :
Salt&Peppa; Shoop.

New :
Qwote; Leave.